I woke up around 4:37AM today. Most of my morning was spent recording myself interpreting music through dance.
I’m sure it’s obvious by now that I love to dance. And I’ve probably already said in multiple posts that I am not a ‘real’ dancer. I’ve been a pretend dancer since I was about thirteen. What I mean by that is I’ve been practicing dance since that age but I’ve never had official dance lessons. I’ve probably also told the story about the time when I was in high school and a real dancer confronted me because she suspected I was lying about being a dancer. She asked me how many pirouettes I could do. It just so happened that the World Book Encyclopedia had not included pirouettes among the ballet terms in the section I was using as a resource to teach myself ballet. I had no idea what pirouettes were but I figured a high number would be more impressive than a low number. So I said I could do 100 of them. The girl just gave me a disgusted look and walked off. I understood why when I went home and looked up the term pirouette.
The last time I checked the record for the most pirouettes stood at 40. I can do 1 very graceful and controlled pirouette. Sometimes I manage two but never gracefully and vertigo always kicks in.
There are many things I have wanted to be in my life. And when you really think about it, I am doing everything I have ever wanted to do pretty much every day even if I may not have become any of the things I wanted to become. I love to interpret music through dance and so I interpret music through dance. I don’t just sit and watch other people dance while feeling sorry for myself wishing I had been able to get dance lessons when I was younger.
I guess when all is said and done it was never really about “being a dancer” for me. It was about dancing. I just wanted to express myself. I didn’t really need to know names for dance moves and the proper technique for executing those moves. I didn’t care about such things as being able to say I could do more pirouettes than someone else. I just wanted to dance.