Blog Archives for category Journal
Pedunculated fibroid – Fibroids that move
Today I was googling the term “fibroids look like babies” because in a way some do look like fetuses to me and I have wondered if there could be any connection between growing fibroids and failing to get pregnant over many years…if something happens with your eggs and your uterus anyway that creates fibroids. Yeah I know that’s a pretty stupid thought. Still, I wonder if there’s any possibility that fibroids represent babies that were supposed to happen but never did. Anyway, I was checking google to see if anyone else is as crazy as I am to have thought that fibroids kind of look like babies; and I came upon a link to a page where someone was writing in to describe her experience with moving fibroids. I clicked on it because it’s something I experience. I have a fibroid that moves. Apparently these types of fibroids are called pedunculated fibroids. They hang from a stalk and can be either subserous pedunculated fibroids meaning they grow outside the uterus, or they can be pedunculated submucosal fibroids meaning they grow inside the uterus (you might want to look that up for yourself in case I have it mixed up). I believe at least 2 of my fibroids can be classified as pedunculated. I have one that moves about sometimes when I… Continue reading »
An update on status of my efforts at shrinking fibroids naturally
It has been a long time since I have written an update. I know most of my posts of late have started this way because I write an update then I disappear for an age. Although I have had a number of ups and downs with my fibroids since my last post, for the most part I have managed to maintain the results I have so far achieved since starting my second attempt at shrinking my fibroids back in November 2010. It has actually been 2 years since I was told that my situation had reached a critical point and that a hysterectomy was absolutely necessary and that the procedure needed to be done as soon as possible. The way the doctor put it to me was something to the effect that she wasn’t saying I was in critical danger but the situation was “emergent” and I needed to try to qualify for emergency medicaid or something because I needed to get it done. I have not since been back to the doctor. Yes, I know, it’s irresponsible; but I still don’t have health insurance and I still can’t pay out of pocket for the visit so it is what it is. In the meantime I am doing what I can to take care of myself and I’m feeling better… Continue reading »
The fibroid that is my life
Haven’t done an update in a bit. It gets to a point where you just don’t feel motivated to keep updating when nobody’s really reading anyway. I had done pretty well with my juice fast. Like I said in one of my last posts I was even able to go out to the store wearing a t-shirt I could not have worn before the fast. My stomach shrank significantly; but it was all a sort of illusion. The minute you start to eat again your stomach grows right back. It’s ridiculous. I can’t live on juice for the rest of my life. I’m a little bit frustrated right now, not just with the whole fibroid stuff and trying to figure out a stable if not permanent solution. I’m frustrated with my life. I am sick and tired of being poor and having to deal with everything that comes with that. I ate a lot today. I woke up and from the moment I woke up I was picking at stuff and I just kept picking at stuff through the entire day. I can barely breathe my stomach is so distended. Life just basically sucks. I am pretty much alone out here which isn’t new. My life has been like this for the last 15 – 20 years. It’s been just… Continue reading »
Pondering my life my fibroids my grandmother and all that good bad stuff
I know the title of my post makes no sense. It is the morning of day 13 of my 21 day juice fast. I am wondering if I need to stop drinking the naked protein zone juice I’ve been consuming since I started this fast. 4 servings of this drink takes me to over 100 grams of sugar. I’m thinking that might be dangerous. In fact I’ve been feeling a little off since last night and the feeling in my blood is similar to when I’ve had too much sugar. With diabetes running in the family I probably shouldn’t be taking a risk like this but I have nothing else to drink. We’re in such a bind right now financially it’s shameful and embarrassing. Still, I’m not sure if I’ll drink that Naked Protein zone smoothie today. I think there’s too much sugar and too little of other needed nutrients in my blood right now. I woke up depressed this morning. This is not unusual for me. I woke up feeling hopeless, like it was pointless to go on breathing. I’m worried and I’m scared and I feel like my life has no purpose. I don’t know who I am. I don’t know where I’m going. I feel like I have nothing to give to life and there’s nothing for… Continue reading »
Is there a corelation between lack of sleep and fibroids?
Since about 2005 I have had a problem sleeping. Maybe it started before 2005 but I became aware of it in 2005. My life changed suddenly and dramatically in 2005. I can’t go into details about what happened because I’m still so ashamed that the choices I made in selecting a life partner put me in that situation in the first place and I am still with the same individual; but that’s not really the point of this. I woke up at 4AM this morning. This has been the pattern since 2005. I will wake up between 2 AM and 4 AM with a feeling of complete and utter dread and hopelessness. Like I said this started in June 2005 when my life underwent an abrupt change that was very traumatic for me. The problem has since remained. I do manage to get some sleep on occasion but for the past 7 years I really haven’t been sleeping well. It’s only now writing about this that it dawns on me there could be a link between the traumatic experience I suffered in June 2005 and the mental and emotional strains I was suffering in the years before that and have been suffering since, and the development of this problem with fibroids. For sure I know that the fibroids began to… Continue reading »
Picture of stomach with fibroids
I don’t want to act like having fibroids is the worse thing possible because I know that there are many worse things than having to walk around looking like you’re pregnant or like you need to incorporate crunches and situps into your workout regimen when you are not pregnant and you’re not fat and out of shape. Out of consideration for all the people in the world who are living with serious illnesses that threaten their lives, I’ll endeavor to avoid making out my situation to be some kind of major crisis. Yes, this is very real health problem that impacts on daily living in ways that undermine overall quality of life; but I’m not likely to die because of my fibroids. I’m sure it’s possible to die because of fibroids, but it’s highly unlikely. That being said, having to walk around with lumps in my stomach that change the shape of my body to something that is considered not attractive is very unpleasant for me. Being someone who has always had a heightened level of image consciousness, it’s very difficult to live in this altered body that I have acquired due to uterine fibroids. When I first found out I had them I didn’t hesitate to start making plans for a hysterectomy because there was no way I was… Continue reading »
Is it true that fibroids are mainly a Black woman problem?
I find it odd that they say 80% of women have fibroids and yet they suggest that fibroids is mostly a problem for African American women. African American women make up such a small minority that it does not mathematically make any sense to me to say that 80% of all women have fibroids and yet classify fibroids are mainly a Black woman problem. When you make fibroids out to be a mainly African American woman problem then you start to make wide assumptions and draw conclusions based on those wide assumptions. You also tend to allow your assumptions and stereotypical ideas about Black women to influence how you approach your investigation into trying to find out what causes fibroids which inevitably confuses the whole process of finding a fix for the problem. Some of what I see based on the things I read suggest to me that someone decided all Black women are obese as a result of eating greasy unhealthy food every day so therefore fibroids grow as a result of being overweight and eating unhealthy foods. This is a picture of me taken around the time my fibroids began to develop. At the time it was the biggest I had ever been in my life. Sad to say I spent most of my life with body image… Continue reading »
Cannot sit comfortably because of fibroids
I’m not at a good place with my fibroids right now. For the last couple of months life has been out of order and highly stressful and things won’t be settling down at least until the end of September. I haven’t been keeping up with my fibroid management routine. I’ve been working out so that’s been helping but working out alone won’t keep your fibroids under control, at least it hasn’t been the case for me that working out is enough by itself to manage my fibroids. Right now I am having difficulty sitting. The one fibroid that tends to lodge itself right under my rib cage is doing its thing. It could be because of my cycle. I have a few days to wait and see, but for sure my stomach is not as flat as it was a couple of months back. Not that it was flat then. I don’t know if I can have my flat stomach back without getting the fibroids completely removed; but my stomach was definitely “flatter” a couple of months ago than it is today and the difference has been that I haven’t been keeping up with the regimen I designed for myself. Things I know I don’t need to be eating I’ve been eating, and I haven’t been drinking my tea. On… Continue reading »
Could depression cause fibroids or fibroids cause depression?
Personally I think without question fibroids can bring about depression, or even if they don’t necessarily bring on depression directly, they will certainly do nothing to help mitigate depressive feelings; and the toll they can take on you physically can definitely affect you mentally. Whether or not depression can cause fibroids to grow in the first place, that’s a completely different discussion. I know I’ve come across material that suggests stress causes fibroids to grow. Of course this is not scientific; but in what ever manner stress would lead to the development of fibroid tumors, whether directly or indirectly, it would seem that depression should be capable of doing the same. I do doubt strongly that stress or depression can make stuff grow in your body. I think there needs to be something more concrete. When you really think about it, stress and depression are completely mental, and the idea that either one can make tumors grow in a woman’s uterus would be nearly impossible to prove without some physical thing you can look at and examine and say, this particular chemical or physical manifestation of stress and/or depression created fibroids via x y or z process. I’m willing to believe that it’s possible to mess with the chemicals of your body just by elevating your stress or by being… Continue reading »
I probably shouldn’t be eating oatmeal if I want to shrink my fibroids but…
I just had some oatmeal. It was a very small amount. Probably less than half of a serving. I had to make some for my son and there was a little left over so I decided to have it because I haven’t had anything to eat yet for the day and it’s 12:03PM. So why, you are probably wondering, am I making oatmeal for my son at 12:03PM? Well, I was supposed to make it hours ago but I was busy getting this website up and running, transferring my stuff from the website where I had previously been posting about my progress. I don’t know if oatmeal is good or bad to eat when you have fibroids. I haven’t really focused my fibroid shrinking efforts around food as far as deciding that I can’t eat this food or that food. I’ve mostly just realized I can’t eat lots of heavy foods and I have to eat in very small quantities. This has worked really well for me; but I’ll admit I have my days when I have a little too much. It’s never that I over eat. I don’t have the room in my stomach to eat a normal amount of food. Because of the size and position of my fibroids it takes very little eating before I’ve reached the… Continue reading »